What Kind of Halloween Scrooge Shit is This

Lord Dampnut Jr. decided to celebrate Halloween this year by taking a shot at "socialism," or what he thinks is socialism, and failed hard.

I’m going to take half of Chloe’s candy tonight & give it to some kid who sat at home. It’s never to early to teach her about socialism. pic.twitter.com/3ie9C0jv2G

— Donald Trump Jr. (@DonaldJTrumpJr) October 31, 2017

First of all, this poor child who has to pose for this sad photo on the best night of the year, like what did he tell her to make her face like that? Did he actually tell her he was going to take away half of her candy because socialism?

Second, no form of socialism I know about includes taxing little children for their candy.

Third, Halloween is already about people with money buying food to give away to people without any money. It's not about "WORK FOR YOUR SUGAR BITS, CHILDREN."

And last and most shameful at all, um, there are actually kids who can't go out on Halloween?

When I was 5, I ran a high fever on Halloween & stayed home. A neighbor gave me half her candy, teaching me the value of compassion & generosity. https://t.co/J8bwYOnjFK

— Betsey Stevenson (@BetseyStevenson) November 1, 2017

Donald Trump Jr. should be punished for this tweet by having to tour children's hospitals until he breaks down sobbing.

In a communist society, which is probably closer to what DTJ means when he says "socialism," sick and disabled kids would get all the food they need for free without having to walk door to door for the amusement of healthy adults. Because communists think leaving these kids out, let alone leaving them to die, is bad.

Good lord, fuckin' Scrooge McDuck Jr. I couldn't make you look worse than you make yourself look if my life depended on it.