Another thing that happened while I was on vacation was the resurfacing of that incredibly gross article all about how to effectively harass and force women who clearly don't want to be bothered to talk to you. I don't know how anybody could possibly make it any clearer to men how fucked up and terrifying this is, but there are still many of them that refuse to get it. There's always men, any time this shit comes up, who go "But I'm a Nice Guy (TM)! My intentions are good, so shouldn't I get a pass on this behavior?"
No. Because every woman has a story about a dude who approached them by "being nice," saying nice things or acting like a "gentleman," and then the moment they're not getting what they want, they go full on Mr. Hyde. Hell, these "nice guys" will sometimes but on the nice charade for years before turning on women who thought they had a friend. Sometimes to the point of demanding sex, sometimes to the point of rape.
Do you perhaps not believe that nearly all women have had an experience like this (not to mention have heard of similar experiences from so many female friends) and are therefore wary of men no matter what the approach? Well, one of your fellow men, the fabled Actual Male Ally Mooseplainer Max, has gathered a devastatingly long list of examples of things so-called "nice guys" said to them or did for them before showing their true colors.
Here are some of my favorite examples in a list that seems to never fucking end:
Men just *love* to help me by opening doors etc. then try to neg. me about my disabilities https://t.co/ar45b8YoxJ— raven (@femmemystique_) September 1, 2016
"You seem busy. How about I catch up with you later?"— Alexandra Erin (@alexandraerin) September 1, 2016
"That's so nice, thanks!"
"THAT WAS A TEST AND YOU FAILED IT." https://t.co/z4lhEZVNqA
Helped me move a matress out of my abusers home. Then demanded sex. https://t.co/jIxtd3z5Lc— Ya know, Love Wins (@MiyakaLee) September 1, 2016
Oh you know, just generally pretending to be my best friend (two separate guys did this) and then STALK/HARASS/STALK https://t.co/C2sWg2LO37— the lizard queen (@theskooks) September 1, 2016
Offered me a ride to the house of the friend I was staying with. Wouldn't let me out of the car until we "had sex" https://t.co/owEIJDmlFT— Americannah (@sebhar) September 1, 2016
approached me on basis of helping me look for my cat. made "jokes" about handling my pussy until I hid in a shop. https://t.co/dlBSR7AxUa— resting birch face (@hayBEARS) September 1, 2016
(tw violence)— Sullie (@sulliemoose) September 1, 2016
Complimented my baking, before going in for an unwanted hug. I backed away, he tried to stab me. https://t.co/RF0C70asqR
(Offers to give me a ride home)— Caitlin (@icanseethebunny) September 2, 2016
(Threatens violence if I don't say yes) https://t.co/ftvnSUCjcK
"You're special, unique, fascinating, so glad I've known you for 5 years"— Katherine Crocker (@cricketcrocker) September 2, 2016
*Tries to assault me in his basement* https://t.co/FRdQkQypNt
Seriously, the list is so long. I haven't read the entire thing because there are over 100 responses, just from this one inquiry from one Twitter account. This is what women deal with. This is why we're afraid of men. We try to navigate public spaces safely, but men do everything they can to make sure we don't feel safe, then whine about it when we try to stand up for ourselves.
If you feel at all entitled to a woman's time and attention, you're not a nice guy. If you think your ability to get fucked is more important than a woman's safety or comfort, you're not a nice guy. You, in fact, have a rapist mentality, are a horrible person, and don't deserve sex from anyone ever. The end. Not sorry.