The Conversation You Must Have With Your Sons
It's not just this, of course, but until rape culture is dead, this needs to happen. Unfortunately we can't count on schools to do this shit, but the good news is that at least there's something concrete you can do if you have a son. Hell if my friends start having kids, I'll be happy to volunteer to have these conversations with them, starting at very young ages.
Your son is coming of age in that culture with those messages swirling around him. You might have raised him in a home that perpetuated that culture without ever intending to or perhaps you raised him in a home that taught values in complete contrast to that culture. The more important question is: did you ever directly tell him to never buy into that culture? Did you ever tell him that culture is unacceptable and WRONG? Did you ever have any of the aforementioned conversations?
You gotta. Because:
But sexual assault is pervasive despite the conversations many parents have had with their daughters. It seems that the “don’t get raped” angle is not a successful strategy for curbing this pandemic. In fact, it is counter-productive as it perpetuates a culture where men don’t feel the need to take responsibility.
If you don't like the idea of telling your teenage son not to rape or think he won't take you seriously, then feel free to teach him at a young age the essential concepts of consent, respect, and bodily autonomy. Teach him that he is not to touch anyone without their consent and that being told "no" or "stop" means he must stop immediately. Teach by example, too.
You don't want to be the parent of another rapist, do you?