Thursday, January 7, 2016

Do We Need to Talk About Consent Again

[TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE, RAPE CULTURE. DISCUSSION OF SEX ACTS]

I saw an article going around Tumblr yesterday discussing the disturbing trend of men pressuring women for anal sex. It's painful to know that so many people don't understand the idea of coercive rape. If you try to do something sexual to your partner and they stop you, you need to fucking stop. If you try do to that same thing AGAIN, you're committing sexual assault. You know they don't want that and yet you're trying to do it anyway. In the case of anal sex, that's attempted rape.

If your partners tells you to stop and you turn into a big whiny baby about it or you beg and plead and ask over and over and over until they finally give in to shut you up or stop fighting and silently let you do it, THAT'S RAPE. You're overpowering someone's defenses for the sake of your own pleasure or sense of power. That is rape. You shouldn't be begging for any kind of sex or sexual act after someone says no. It's not only pathetic, it means you're acting like a rapist. And if you succeed, you will be one.

And yet, for the everloving fuck of shit (yes I know that makes no sense), I still hear over and over about men who go way beyond coercion. They will just go ahead with major sex acts like putting a penis or finger in an asshole without asking at all. They'll just do it during otherwise consensual sex. That's rape, you fucking shitheads. You can't penetrate someone without consent. I don't care if you're already penetrating her in another hole. You have. To get. Consent. This is not a hard concept to understand, and the fact that so many men try to resist understanding this incredibly basic concept is part of rape culture. They want to be able to do anything to their mostly female partners and get away with it. They want to treat women like fuck dolls. We can thank mainstream porn industries for that.

If you do something sexual to your partner without asking and they say "stop" or "I don't like that" and you continue or say "it's just ______" and continue or whine like a pathetic dog and continue, that's sexual assault and/or rape. Obviously. This should all be extremely obvious. And if you didn't know any of this already then you need to sit the fuck down, consider whether you've already raped someone, and then cease all sexual activity until you educate yourself on consent so that you don't rape anyone in the future. If you don't want to do that, fuck you, you fucking rapist piece of garbage.

The end.

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