Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Racists Guarantee Star Wars VII Will Be a Huge Hit

When I first saw #BoycottStarWarsVII on the trending list on Twitter, my first thought was "oh no, what did they do to Star Wars now?" But then I found out that it's just a bunch of racists super mad that one of the film's lead characters is a black guy.

Apparently this guy here is going to promote "white genocide":

He looks more like he's going to promote poor aim. Because storm trooper. Haha.

Anyway, I'd been pretty uninterested in the new Star Wars movie since being horribly disappointed three times in a row last time they decided to make new Star Wars movies. Now, thanks to racists, I understand that the lead characters are a woman and a black man. And I, along with everyone else who wants to spite racists by seeing a movie, will be seeing the shit out of this movie. Since I know that's a lot of people, I foresee much profits in this movie's future.

Seriously, how racist do you have to be to see a single black protagonist in some sci-fi movie and go "WHITE GENOCIDE, ANTI-WHITE PROPAGANDA, KILL IT." Every halfway decent person who at least doesn't want people to know they're racist is going to go to this movie now. Just write JJ Abrams a check, white supremacists.

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