Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Mail Time!

[TRIGGER WARNING: RAPE, DESCRIPTION OF RAPE AT LINK, RAPE APOLOGIA]


Today's letter comes from Martin, and it's a bummer.

Hi!  
Let me start by saying that I've been following your writings here for a while now and I really appreciate your perspective on various topics (for example the Greece thing). 
However, the reason I'm writing this right now is that you're probably the only feminist writer I know who's actually aware of MtG... 
Here's the thing: There's been a huge discussion over a somewhat well-known player getting banned from the game. This happened because 12 years ago he broke the law. How? Well, he raped a girl. The specifics are truly fucking terrible and I recommend not reading: www.readthehook.com/94459/news-slumped-over-alleged-rape-followed-party 
I think you might be expecting where I'm going with this. Yes, obviously, 95% of the almost uniformly male online community got up in arms to defend the rapist. There do not seem to be any articles pointing out that this kind of reaction is just infuriating. 
So I started wondering that maybe you could post a few simple thoughts on that? 
My sincere apologies if I'm out of line with this. If I was a better writer, I'd probably try to do it myself. 
Regards,
Martin

Dear Martin,

It's okay for anyone to ask me to address issues you're concerned about, as long as you're not demanding education on something I've already written about several thousand times. Thanks for being a fan! Feels weird to say that!

Anyway, yes, I'm not surprised at all that the MtG (Magic the Gathering for laypeople) is standing up for the guy. I did some additional research and it looks like he accepted a lesser charge of aggravated sexual assault and he's now a registered sex offender. So they're defending a sex offender. Fun.

Male-dominated geek communities in general have a huge problem with this kind of thing, and I believe it has everything to do with men feeling entitled to sex and when they don't get what they feel they're entitled to, they become awful.

See: Elliot Rodger and Adam Lanza

Also, I believe men like to defend rapists because they know in their hearts that they might do the same thing one day, and they want to be able to get away with it.

There's also a little thing called the "just world fallacy," in which people so desperately want to believe that there's some innate order and justice to the world. So when something so terrible as rape happens, and especially when they identify with that rapist somehow or are even a fan of the rapist, they need to believe that the victim somehow deserved it (victim blaming) or that it must not have actually happened.

There are a lot of articles on the subject.

But if you can get your head out of your ass and face the world as it is, you'll realize it's incredibly clear that this guy is a convicted sex offender and therefore should be banned from anything involving people, really. The end.

Sincerely,

Lindsey

No comments: