Last night on Twitter, self-described sexist Brad Wardell was getting a lot of well-deserved criticism for being a self-described sexist.
Apparently, in 2010, a woman left Wardell's company after he sent her a nasty reply to an email she sent him requesting that he stop being a gross dudebro harasser. Actually, she was rather polite in the email, which you can read in entirety on Kotaku. Wardell is now calling this email "snotty," which is infantilizing and pretty misogynistic.
In his reply email, he flat-out refuses to stop making misogynistic, gross jokes and says, "I am an inappropriate, sexist, vulgar, and embarrassing person and I'm not inclined to change my behavior. If this is a problem, you will need to find another job."
Then: "I'm not some manager or coworker of yours. I own the company. It, and your job here, exist to suit my purposes, not vice versa."
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This all is gross and horrible and illegal on so many levels. I could go on for a very long time about how awful this guy is and the entire case around it, but that's not what this post is for. I just want it to be clear that Wardell admitted to making sexist jokes, admitted to being a sexist, and then refuse to stop. So, he's terrible. Full stop. Okay.
Then this happened.
I don't think dogpiling @draginol is a good look. @sardonictaunts @paulengelhard @CranBoonitz @Chickowits @SirGoldenrod @srhbutts @xvszero— Ian Miles Cheong (@stillgray) June 25, 2015
Ian Miles Cheong is a guy who has been very vocal in his support of women against GamerGate assholes. He seemed in every respect to be a person who frequently engaged in ally work for women, and I'd come to view him as someone I could count on. I don't know if he ever claimed to be a male ally or a feminist, but he certainly acted like it.
Now suddenly he's indirectly defending Wardell, admitted and proud sexist (and total GamerGater), by saying "dogpiling" the guy isn't a "good look."
So basically, coming together to call out an admitted sexist and demonstrate that his behavior will not be tolerated and go without consequences is unattractive.
How many times have women been told that standing up for themselves is unattractive? It's right up there with "you're getting too emotional" and "you'll never land a husband with that attitude."
I was stunned, deeply disappointed, and frankly, hurt.
When I called Ian out, I got this:
@NotSorryFem Don't be obnoxious.— Ian Miles Cheong (@stillgray) June 25, 2015
Apparently I was dead wrong about Ian. Not only is he willing to engage in misogynistic tropes, he defends an admitted sexist from the apparently unforgivable crime of "dogpiling," which is I guess when some mystery number of people call out someone on Twitter at the same time. According to Ian, "a dozen" is too many. I guess we should be considerate of the admitted and proud sexist and sexual harasser and only call him out one at a time so that his mentions don't get too overwhelmed with criticism. That could be mildly inconvenient or make him feel bad.
I straight up wrote a blog post defending Ian when GamerGaters were accusing him of being a Nazi. I can't help but kind of regret it, because I'm fucking spiteful like that, even though accusing anyone who is clearly not a Nazi of being a Nazi is reprehensible as shit. I guess right now I'm just that hurt and disappointed. But women everywhere should know that Ian Miles Cheong is not a male ally. Don't count on him and I wouldn't recommend following him. Especially because right now he's calling the removal of all games that contain the Confederate flag from Amazon "censorship" when he's not fucking black and therefore should be keeping his fucking mouth shut.
Men are constantly disappointing. Sigh.